Hey all,
I'm really sorry that I haven't posted in here for so long and to be honest, I'm not sure that I will following this post. Because last time I did, I found myself feeling overwhelmed with all the additional leads people were asking me to follow. It also made me feel a tad anxious about everything.
But, I also found this forum extremely helpful in the research of my podcast and so having seen some of the previous comments, etc. I thought I owed it to you all that I addressed them first hand.
Where I'm at with the podcast?
There are countless behind the scene reasons why I've stalled - again - on this podcast but much of it comes down to me. I started the podcast with motivation because I believed in his innocence but as you're all aware, I no longer feel way.
It's been a real challenge to get this podcast finished because I've been really conscious of making any mistakes with it and that fear has really hindered my progress.
I've felt overwhelmed and uncertain about it numerous times. But I no longer feel that as I've decided exactly how I now intend to forge forward.
For the sake of my mental health, I have to remove myself from the WHF debate, finishing the podcast in the best way that I can. Being as accurate as I can. But also appreciating that I have a finite amount of time.
I also work full-time and so I've had to prioritise which parts of the case matter the most. I'm not really that worried about who Jeremy slept with and why, unless in some way it's related. And even if it is, if I can't trace the person or engage in the debate, there's little point in my pursuing it.
So, I've chosen instead to focus on the accepted facts and the disputed evidence.
For that reason, I don't want to spend hours pouting over things that feel unnecessary. I'm going to focus on what I feel is important and get to business on those.
Inaccuracies made
I also think it's important to point out that inaccuracies shouldn't be mistaken for attempts at 're-writing history and it's still my intention to present an accurate and factual series. Any mistakes made have been just that.
I have made mistakes, I know that I have, and I kick myself every time I notice one. But the pause in content was because I was finalising everything and I think future episodes will be much more accurate.
I'm re-recording previous episodes because I know they can be done better.
The Brett Collins interview
I edited the Brett Collins interview because I had to. There was no choice but to edit it. And for various reasons which I can't and won't go into, I am not in a position to publish that in full.
And for that very same reason, the original, unedited interview will not be published or shared. Although it was my initial intention to do so, it no longer is.
I've also noticed some huge inconsistencies and errors in what Brett has said to me and what he's said since. I don't think Brett is lying, I just think he's a bit all over the place with his memory at times.
I'm re-scripting and editing the Brett interview because, again, it could be done better and there are certain changes I want to make.
The goal now
My goal now is to finish the podcast. To use as a vehicle for identifying the truth in this case as best we can.
The campaign team is no longer engaging with me and won't reply to my emails. I spent a good amount of time at Crime Con avoiding them, because as far as I'm aware it was a last-minute choice for them to go (they were donated tickets from someone who couldn't go).
As Carol Ann Lee said in her part of the documentary (she is now a dear friend to me, who doesn't deserve the rubbish she gets thrown at her) it's important that the correct narrative is told.
My intention now is to finish my podcast, accepting that I probably will still make some mistakes despite my months of research, and to put my involvement with this case behind me. It's important to me that I do finish the podcast because of the amount of effort I've put in, and because I think it's important to show the evidence.
Any of the additional documents I've found will be added to the website at a later date and while I don't have that much to add, I do have the wills if anyone is interested in seeing those.
All that said, I am honestly so exhausted with the Bamber case. The podcast is not what it was supposed to be when it was started and I am very, very keen to get it finished and put behind me.
