I believe the McCann's are quite right in keeping the twins 'in the loop'. They are explaining everything to them and letting them know exactly what is happening so that they know the truth, then if anything is said to them they do not feel upset that they are hearing something that they didn't have a clue about, also if anything untoward is said they know that the person is wrong and will be able to react accordingly.
There is no way the twins can be kept from all the goings on, the McCann's can't stop them finding things out as they get older, neither, as they want the hunt to continue for Madeleine can the McCann's just sweep everything under the carpet as if Madeleine didn't exist.
For some now to say that they feel sorry for the twins and what they are having to put up with when they go to school is just nine years too late. People should have thought of the twins from word go and have refrained from calling their parents murders and liars, accusing them of all sorts of things when nothing has been proven.
The McCann's would have had help with dealing with the twins and what they should know and how they should be told, they are coming along fine Kate said so they sound as though they are level headed and normal children.
All this 'living in Madeleine's shadow' is ludicrous, they know they have a missing sister and that she is being looked for, they are leading normal lives otherwise.
As for the twins raising money for 'No Stone Unturned' as anyone stopped to wonder if the school itself suggested it and not the McCann's?